The title of this post is lyrics to Unchained Melody. It was one of my grandmothers favorite songs, and it always reminds me of her. See little one, she was a really amazing woman- she would do anything for anyone, and everyone that met her fell in love with her. She was a motther figure to a lot of people, and an idol to many. She passed pretty suddenly from cancer when I was thirteen.
Sometimes I can still smell her perfume in the air, and I know she’s here. I’ve been smelling her perfume a lot.
A few weeks ago, I got the oddest feeling. I fell asleep, and an hour later I awoke to the strongest scent of her perfume in the air, and I could almost feel her presence with me. It felt like a hug without a physical body. I cannot put in to words what kind of an experience it was, but I knew in my heart at that moment that she was there. And I just had this overwhelming feeling that she was trying to tell me that everything was going to be okay.
I think sometimes that her, RB’s grandfather, God, fate, kismet…that it’s all working magic to get you to us in the end.
Time is ticking by so slowly this week. RB and I are trying hard to keep busy. Tonight we installed a new carpet runner, and tomorrow we’re going to do some cleaning and organizing. This weekend we’re going to paint the room that hopefully will be your room one day soon, and buy a new couch. Sunday can’t seem to get here soon enough.
In other news, my mom is healing from her accident slowly but surely. She sees another doctor tomorrow for follow up. It will be a slow road ahead, but I am so so lucky that she is okay.
There are so many thoughts running through my head this week, it’s getting difficult to organize them in here, so I apologize for the randomness. My mind is like the ending credits to a movie on triple fast foward lately.
I want nothing more than you in my arms. I keep thinking, If little one were here right now, what would we be doing? Would I be rocking you to sleep? Would I be counting your tiny fingers? Would I be brushing the hair out of your face as you cuddled in to the crook of my arm? Would you be up crying, and I’d be waiting to comfort you? Would I be watching you sleep?
One day down, too many to count to go.
We’re all working so hard to get you here- and we can’t wait to be your parents.
Come home soon Little One…